The Fragile Leader

Don't be easily broken.

I recently received a package I'd been waiting on for weeks. It had to come from overseas, and it was supposed to be a really beautiful superhero statue. The packaging was in good shape, and I was excited to see what was inside. Unfortunately, as soon as I picked up the box, I heard rattling in it that I knew shouldn't be there. Sure enough, when I opened it, I was looking at the pieces of what was supposed to be something awesome.

Did you know there are leaders who are very much like that? On the outside, they look solid and seem like a perfect fit for the organization, but when stress arises and their leadership skills are put to the test, they fall apart. When you look closer, you see a metaphorical "Handle with care" on their packaging. No one wants to serve under a leader like that.

A leader has to be the example people look to in a crisis. They have to be the steady hand on the wheel, guiding the organization to uncharted territory or greater heights.

When you fly, you always look to the flight attendants to see what their reactions are in turbulence. If they ignore it and keep doing their duties, you know the plane is going to be okay. Even if they have to buckle up for a little bit, you see them on their phones or laughing with each other, and you feel a little better. If your flight attendant buckled up at the slightest bump and started crying and screaming, "We're not going to make it" every five minutes, you'd be in for a bad trip until you reached your destination.

If you are the leader of your team, then like it or not, they're looking at you when turbulence comes. What will you do?

Here are a few ways to be the type of leader people want to follow rather than avoid:

1) Keep calm and carry on. Be the example when it is needed.

When things go wrong (and they will at some point), be the steady hand they need to see. Your team will react to your reactions. Even if you don't have a clue what to do next, make them think you do. Step away to make plans and decide on options, then come back with clear directions. Whatever you do, don't run around (literally or metaphorically) screaming, "We're not going to make it!"

2) Be approachable, with boundaries.

If there are questions, make sure they know they can come to you. At the same time, make sure they understand what is expected of them. They can't come to you every time a decision needs to be made because each person has to carry their own responsibilities for the success of the team. If they are incapable of making a decision without talking to you, then it might be time to seriously reexamine their suitability for their role.

3) Add value to people. Give more than you take.

There is nothing wrong with asking a lot of your team, but always make sure you are pouring into them rather than just always demanding results. Give clear directions, good teaching of new tasks, and make real connections. If you see your team as nothing more than a means to an end, they will know it.

4) Help them be the best versions of themselves, not a pale imitation of you.

Develop the next level of leadership in your team. Create leaders, not followers. Discover the strengths of your team and build upon them. If someone is incredibly organized, ask them to show others who aren't what works for them to complete their daily tasks. If you choose instead to make them clones of yourself, they will have all your strengths, but they will also have all your weaknesses. Use the pieces of your team to create a whole entity that wins.

Treat your team like they matter, and be prepared to lead them through every situation that comes. Above all else, don't be fragile. Be the example to follow, not the problem to avoid.